Matthew Shaw

Good Men

2009-11-21T19:06:00.000-08:00

I, like anyone else in this wide country of ours, have an appreciation for big-name musicians like Norah Jones or Kenny G, people who have indisputable talent. However, one of my favorite musicians is an unknown from my home town. Aaron Lee Martin sings a kind of folk/indy-rock/bluegrass style. The best thing about him is the sincere passion with which he plays. He crams his foot into a tambourine and beats it against the floor, while playing a guitar and a harmonica. One time, his tambourine snapped in two from the abuse. He just kicked it aside and kept going.

Go here to listen to Aaron Lee Martin sing Good Men.

His song Good Men tells a woman that though a man may be considered good, he will still fail her. That is because every man is flawed. It is a sad truth which we sometimes forget even though it is inherent in our very bones. No matter how hard a man tries, no matter how far he goes, and even contrary to modern folklore, no matter how much he cares, he will still fail those he loves.

Sometimes, a good man will cause even more pain than an evil man because people trust a good man.

However, in this song there is one differentiating factor. Tenacity. Unlike an evil man, a good man has the sheer guts to hold on long after he has failed. Like Moses, Kind David and Elijah, who failed God in ways that we would condemn as the worst kinds of evil, a good man will always turn back to God when he has gone the wrong way. When he has fallen, he will crawl on hands and knees and on his belly with his face in the dirt if that's what it takes.

In the song, the man says to his beloved that though he is sure to let her down, he will emulate Christ and pursue her tenaciously. He says to her, “I'll be coming right after you.”

One Good Man

2009-10-19T17:47:00.000-07:00

Go here for news and information on One Good Man. This movie will come out some time next year. I manage the blog and write all the content. During Principal Photography I was with the Behind the Scenes team, and also the set medic.

One Good Man

2009-08-25T20:02:00.000-07:00

I am now one of the primary bloggers for Advent Film Group's production, One Good Man. The movie will begin filming September 8th. I'll be traveling to North Carolina to help out on set and chronicle the events for the public.

Sadly, I won't get much money for my time. I'm still just a little fish and am happy for the cred. A lot of people who had never heard of me before will be reading my blog posts every day and I get to spend five weeks on a movie set. It will be hard work, but compared to what I'm used to, it will be like a five week vacation. Besides, working at something fun isn't work.

2009-08-06T21:41:00.000-07:00

Besides being a writer, I also act. All my acting has been on stage so far, but I'm doing what I can to fix that.

The third performance, from The Boys Next Door, may appear somewhat strange. The character I play is mentally disabled. It was the most difficult and rewarding role I've ever played.

Up gets down to business

2009-06-13T21:29:00.000-07:00

The Pluggedinonline movie review said that the film Up could be used in college literature classes as a subject for analysis. I agree.

The film has such depth, such character, and symbolism that at one pass, the viewer can absorb enough meaning to fill all the old man's balloons and the blimp beside. The story alone is so rich it rivals the 3-D textures of the old man's ties.

For instance, the ties alone stand as a marker for the passage of time. The house, reminiscent of Christian's burden in Pilgrim's Progress, represents the old man's baggage from the past and his inability to break free. The bottle cap pin represents the need to pass on a spirit of adventure to others--especially the young.

The old explorer and his ideals (pride, ruthlessness, a conquering spirit) are juxtaposed against the young scout's ideals (curiosity, sympathy and love). This creates a moment of realization for the viewer when the boy says that the jungle isn't what he thought it would be. It's not safe and fun, but dangerous and difficult. In other words, a safe and fun world could be faced with that old ruthlessness but the real world must be challenged with empathy and friendship.

These are just a few examples of the themes in Up. As with any good work of art, it is a pleasure to see on first glimpse. But it is art because it continues to reveal itself again and again on increasingly deeper levels.

Advancement

2009-05-18T17:50:00.001-07:00

I have recently made several advancements in my writing career--nothing where I sign any papers, but significant nonetheless.

I am now done with the second draft of my novel (not including rewrites that were done while completing the first draft). Friends and fellow writers are reading it while I wait for feedback.

Also, several writers' groups have welcomed me into their ranks so that I can enjoy the help and fellowship of my illusive peers. One such group held a conference where I met a several successful writers and gained some more precious knowledge about the world of writing, publishing, and losing-my-mind.

Nathan Bransford rocks

2009-03-05T21:44:00.000-08:00

If you are a writer, you need to read this.

http://nathanbransford.blogspot.com/2009/03/ten-commandments-for-happy-writer.html

Come What May

2009-03-05T07:08:00.000-08:00

This film addresses an uncommon topic: overturning Roe v. Wade. The micro-budget movie is the first movie this new company has made. I look for great things from them in the future.

2009-02-18T11:39:00.000-08:00

Read this now from christianpress.com

"A person's a person, no matter how small."
Dr. Suess

Really?

2009-02-09T11:56:00.000-08:00

Some people laugh and I wonder if they're really laughing. I think, Are they doing what they would do if they were watching Bill Cosby? Surely not--it's too slow, like an engine turning over without a hope. Other people come on so strong I think, She's flirting with me. When I hear her laughing the same way with an ugly guy, I'm glad.

Sincerity.

It isn't just being rude--wearing sweatpants every day (even to a wedding), or telling people off just because. Sincerity is making your actions, you words, you life mean something. Don't be polite because you want that one annoying guy to leave you alone but because you want him to stick around. Forget wearing a tie to church because that's how your father taught you. Wear a tie (or refrain, depending on your nature) because you want to make the day special--your day to rest before the knees of God.

Into the war room with pride

2009-02-02T10:38:00.000-08:00

This clip from the film Gettysburg illustrates forgiveness. In it, General Lee reprimands one of his most important generals, General Stuart.

In the same way that Stuart comes into the room and stands before Lee, the man in charge of all Confederate forces, we walk into the presence of God, full of pride and reasons for our righteousness. Lee wants to hear none of Stuart's excuses. Only one fact matters--Stuart had a duty, regardless of circumstances, at which he failed. We too fail God, whether we mean to or not.

Lee points out Stuart's guilt, not even allowing Stuart to speak. The guilty general's response is still proud, though it appears humble. To relinquish his sword is to be punished. We would rather be punished and pay for our sin than be forgiven.

At this, Lee's anger flairs up. The situation is dire, going beyond honor and Stuart's pride. Stuart has lost sight of the war and only cares about his own situation. We too ignore the bigger picture of God's holiness. Instead, we focus on our own weakness.

In the end, Lee forgives Stuart, not allowing him to even thank the leader. The forgiveness is so final, it's as if the offense had never happened. True forgiveness is not easy to accept. It demands humility and silence. True forgiveness goes one way.

Many Christians who have grown up in the church have trouble understanding this because they have lived decent lives in the eyes of the world and have never felt the deep need for forgiveness from men. Therefore, they fail to grasp the depth of their own salvation and continue to walk into the war room with pride.

Racism?

2009-01-28T15:41:00.000-08:00

I wrote this earlier today on a forum. Because I feel so strongly about the issue, I want to say it again. Here's how I feel about the president.

"Quite frankly, his whole platform of change is based on one thing, and it's not his policies. Many of his cabinet members worked for Clinton (or are Clintons). His campaign used old Democrat strategies and policies: big spending, helping the "poor", peace abroad, etc. What I don't understand is why everyone keeps harping on his color. If it's wrong to keep a man out of a job for his color, how is it right to put him there because of it? I haven't heard very many people, for him or against him, who have commented solely on his policies, or more importantly, his past actions. Everyone says how great it is that he's black but very few people comment on how great it is that Clarence Thomas is black or Condoleezza Rice is black (and a woman).

"When I look at Bush, I don't see a white man. I see a man who did what he thought was right; sometimes he succeeded, sometimes he failed. When I look at Obama, I don't see a black man. I see a man with leftist ideas; I see a man whose very short history in government is tainted with terrorist/racist associations (Bill Ayers, Jeremiah Write) and extreme pro-abortion policies (voting no to the Illinois Born Alive Infant Protection Act multiple times). I see a socialist who will not protect this nation or its interests."

I'm with the press

2009-01-14T04:57:00.000-08:00

A couple of days ago, I got back from a week-long stay in the Alamo city: San Antonio, TX. My goal was to attend and report on the San Antonio Independent Christian Film Festival, a division of Vision Forum ministries. While many events occurred that made me stand in silence, like shaking hands with Dean Jones, Kirk Cameron, and the producers of Expelled, I was most stunned by the way people responded to my press pass.

Everyone wants notoriety, but not everyone wants to talk to the news people. Some of the big shots who I approached would give me suspicious looks and grill me on the newspaper I wrote for. Those I talked to who had little experience with the media would brighten when I told them who I represented and eagerly turn toward me, ready for their chance at getting their name in print. Finally, those who I wasn't speaking to professionally, but nonetheless saw the brilliantly emblazoned word "press" on my chest would look at my face, look at my badge, and look at my face again with a totally different expression. The words "veiled awe" comes to mind.

Rather than make me arrogant, as would so likely be the case, I have tried to use the last week to realize that I'm not really anybody. When Dean Jones talked about "Walt [this]...and Walt said [that]..." it reminded me that my press badge was just a piece of paper, printed by a normal computer, laminated by a normal laminating machine anyone could buy. I haven't done anything extraordinary.

"It's not who I am inside but what I do that defines me."--Batman

EMT

2008-12-21T15:00:00.000-08:00

Here's for the "Otherwise"...

I am unofficially an EMT. I've passed all my examinations and only wait for my card in the mail. It's a load off my chest and a huge block of time that is now free. Free to write and pursue more artistic things.

The Boys Next Door

2008-12-13T10:07:00.000-08:00

My cold has hung on in my throat more tenaciously than our baby schnauzer does to her bone. It may have something to do with the fact that I've been working every day re-shingling a roof in the cold. So today, I'm not working. At least I'm not working outside. I still have lots to do that has been neglected because of the roof. My National Registry exam for EMT is next week; I am behind on my articles for Christian Press; and I have to arrange to go to Texas next month to attend a film festival.

Meanwhile, my cold defies all reason and cough drops.

Looking to the future, I just got cast in a role that shocked even me. We're putting on The Boys Next Door. It's a two act play about four men with mental disabilities living together, and the man who looks after them. I thought I might play the care giver Jack or the schizophrenic Barry but I got neither. Instead, I play what the script describes as a "large black man." I am a man, but I am neither large nor black in any sense of the words.

Nevertheless, the character is incredibly likable and profound. I've never played a man who has the mental capacity "somewhere between that of a five year old, and an oyster." It's going to be demanding and extremely difficult. I will have to visit and spend time with some people who are like the character in order to be as real as possible.

This show isn't just about the mentally handicapped or even people with any kind of handicaps. It's about them and all who are misunderstood and ignored. I see it as a defense of the widows and orphans of the Bible, the unborn babies and the Terri Schiavos of the world.

Aaron Lee Martin

2008-12-01T07:11:00.000-08:00

Aaron Lee Martin plays his instruments as if his life depended on it--as if they were about to kill him and he had to subdue them with his voice. Although he is a very skilled musician, his performances have a true folk quality like he just learned how to play and wants to show his mother what he's learned. He plays to play and not to perform. Even the slow ones feel urgent.

When I saw him last, he succeeded in beating his tambourine into submission. He stuffs his foot into it and raps it violently on the ground. After so much abuse, the thing broke in half during one song so he tossed it away and kicked the rhythm with his moccasinned foot. From a distance, the tambourine rattled back to life through the vibrations of the spongy stage.

Listen to Aaron Lee Martin:

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=53463262

http://www.virb.com/aaronleemartin

America

2008-11-27T20:24:00.000-08:00

For Thanksgiving I had a Japanese friend over to eat with my family. I explained to him the origin of the holiday, of the pilgrims fleeing religious control and thanking God for help in a new land. He thought it was funny how our history only goes back a few hundred years. His extends back thousands--not only 43 presidents, but multiple dynasties of rulers.

In light of the relative youth of our nation, I can't help but feel optimistic in spite of current political circumstances (I'm a proudly staunch conservative). With socialism growling at our doorstep and the people poised to sell out to a hope-monger who votes in favor of infanticide, I see the future like a broad Kansas plain. Like any great empire before, the United States will change for good or for ill.

"The times they are a changin' " writes Bob Dylan.

Now, irony makes the conservative voice the radical in the media. Irony abounds when activists proclaim the cause of diversity then condemn a peaceful union of European pilgrims and Native Americans that has long been a foundation of our country. When the force of "hope and change" chants class envy and murder of innocents, irony spits in the face of tradition. When the people of California speak in peaceful democracy and the minor opposition violently and hatefully spray-paints their churches and threatens their safety, humanism reveals itself for the ugly monster it is.

Yet, America remains young. America, the land I love, my homeland is still the greatest nation on earth. I will fight for her, live for her, die for her. I do not seek to better my own circumstances, but secure America for our posterity.

Spaces

2008-11-25T07:10:00.000-08:00

A few weeks ago, I had a conversation (rather heated but still not an argument) with some friends. We were having trouble talking about more than minor chit-chatty things and someone asked if Adam and Eve had belly buttons. Somehow or other, by pathways del oscuro, we came to the question of the origin of darkness.

Does God make darkness, or dwell within it?

Darkness isn't a thing, but an absence. An absence of light. So our conversation swerved to and fro between issues of matter and time, presence and absence, and parallels to darkness, like coldness, space, and evil.

Evil is the absence of God, right? That's what I have assumed, but how can there be anything outside of God? If God is light, what exactly IS the darkness? From where does it come? At the first creation, before the creation of the earth and mankind, when God first made something, be it angels or the heavenly temple, what was there?

Was it just God? Assuming Light and Dark are parallels to God and the absence of God, was there just light, or was there darkness too? I know that Evil is no match for Good, wherever there is light, darkness always loses.

Always.

So if there was only Light, where did the Darkness come from? On this earth, Light can never create darkness. In fact, Darkness can never be made. It is there when Light dies, or goes away. But the fact remains that if Light fails, Darkness always happens. It is absence.

One idea is that when God first created, He merely opened up voids in Himself. When He created the world, He made spaces between the matter. This theory has problems because it doesn't explain the origin of darkness and space, which is the true question.

In effect, we can never think in terms of Darkness. We only see the presence--the people, not the spaces between them.

Save your breath to cool your porridge.

2008-11-22T07:12:00.000-08:00

Burning the roof of the mouth while eating a pastry or drinking coffee is one of the injustices of the world. The bitter irony is that this injustice is self-inflicted. I myself burn my mouth and effectively ruin the rest of my gastric delight. Thereafter, I speak funny, drink cold water, and curse the pocket of boiling jelly that caused this pain.

Perhaps the answer lies in eating only cold foods. I'm told the Italians boil their vegetables but serve them cold. Odd. I am not convinced that this is a good plan. Somewhere, Newton must have discovered the law that states, "For every degree lost while drinking coffee, the flavor declines exponentially." But this law only applies to coffee that began hot. Iced coffee is a different matter.

The worst food to eat cold is potato soup. Nasty.

Time. Time is the key to the perfect temperature. So, I'll blow on my soup and quickly eat my eggs. I'll eat my salad before my baked potato. But I won't wait too long. Look what happened to the three bears when they left their porridge unattended too long.

2008-10-22T13:43:00.000-07:00

There's something romantic about the word "freelance".

I've started writing articles for a small monthly press, covering simple topics of interest to the local Christian community. Although journalism has never really piqued my imagination, how can I complain about writing for money? It's like I'm back in school turning in papers to the teacher; only now the teacher is an editor and I don't pay him, he pays me.

Some of the greatest novelists were also journalists--Mark Twain, Jack London, and Gabriel Garcia Marquez, to name a few of my favorites.

2008-10-04T16:23:00.000-07:00

An old friend of mine just came out and said that he had decided he is an agnostic.

Agnostic is an ugly word to a Christ follower. It doesn't mean, "I don't believe in God." That statement I can face, argue, or fight against. But the word agnostic means, "I believe you can't make me believe." I don't know how to even address that. Only God can do anything about such an idea and even He has limits. The person has to choose, God won't force.

So I'm stuck wading in a tide of sadness and even anger. Sadness because my friend has rejected what I feel is the key to life. He grew up with faith all around him, tried to grasp it, but ultimately threw it away for what he thought were intellectual reasons.

Donald Miller says that "there are some guys who don't believe in God and they can prove He doesn't exist, and some other guys who do believe in God and they can prove He does exist, and the argument stopped being about God a long time ago and now it's about who is smarter, and honestly I don't care."

But I do care. I care because I see myself less as an evangelist or a preacher and more as a fighter. I fight the forces inside myself and the forces outside myself that try to bring other people away from God and into a world of darkness. Often I lose in the fight, but sometimes I win. In the conflict, the good fighters are outnumbered.

My friend imagines that he is an agnostic because his mind finds no proof that the Bible is true or that the world started in six days. I say his heart has turned away from the truth more than his mind. Science can point away from the theory of evolution (fossil record, cellular evidence, etc.) and agree with a worldwide flood; it can also point toward speciation by natural selection. But arguments abound until everything just sounds like the adults on the Peanuts cartoons: wah wah wah.

Essecially, I'm a Christian. I thought he followed the same faith but he has turned away. As the spiritual fighter, I feel like a soldier whose companion has laid down his arms and walked into the middle of the field with is hands up. My heart screams at my friend to come back, to keep up the fight, but he keeps walking. I look around as my comrads continue to cower or turn away in fear.

I look around and I am alone.

These thoughts are not knew. Writers have written of this fight since it began thousands of years ago. Strangly, knowing that my side has always been outnumbered and always will be gives me comfort and another reason to believe. The faith of others, even if they are long gone, reminds me that they fought and died in the same world. In the same war.

I can die for Him too. Even if I'm the last man on earth who believes that Jesus is the Son of God, I can still die for Him. Even though my closest friend or my family may abandon me, I can still die for my Jesus because that's what He did for me.

2008-09-27T08:23:00.000-07:00

Hello, God.

Hi, how's it going?

Oh, good grief. As if you don't know. Is that your idea of a joke?

Kinda. I just ask so you can tell me yourself.

Yeah, whatever. Listen, I've been thinking. And I'd like to ask you a question.

Go ahead, I like an inquisitive mind. I designed it after all.

Good, here it goes. I've been thinking, you know, reevaluating some things. I've taken stock of my job, my family, the people I work with and the things that have happened to me in the past few years. Keeping in mind that you control the universe and all that, I'd like to say something regarding my life.

Ok, go ahead.

Here it is: are you KIDDING me?

I don't follow you.

Oh, don't be coy. You know EVERYTHING for crying out loud. You know perfectly well the idiots I have to put up with around here. My wife thinks I'm ridiculous. My boss doesn't respect me. And I don't get paid enough! You call that blessing?

I call that more than you deserve.

I work hard.

True. But I want you to learn something from life and to grow. You can't grow if I don't stretch you.

Oh, what do you know. You're God. It's easy for you.

You're pushing it.

I mean, have you seen my car? I have to pay to fix that!

Are you done?

And what's with my mother? It's like she thinks I'm still in the first grade.

Ever read the book of Job? Deal with it.

This isn't some story, God. I'm suffering here.

I've heard enough.

Would you listen to what I'm trying to say?

I've taken stock of you're life too. Now I realize that you are a selfish, lazy slob, who doesn't love his family. You hate your parents and have dreamed of killing your boss. Yesterday, you cheated on your wife. And you want me to bless you?

Umm, well.

What do you expect me to do?

Have pity?

Pity! Did you have pity on your son when he asked for a second chance? Did you have pity when your brother came to you for help? No, I don't think pity is right for you.

But...

NO! You will say nothing more until I pass judgment! I am the CREATOR, the FIRST AND THE LAST. You are nothing but a stench in my presence.

I'm sorry, I...

In light of your behavior, remembering the laws set forth at the beginning of the world, I have no other choice...

Oh, crap.

...but to die for you. Go in peace.

Amen.

Lilies

2008-09-25T10:02:00.001-07:00

The instant I give in to despair, I get what I want.

"Hello, Life Lesson. I'm Stupid."

For the past several weeks I've been bemoaning my lack of steady work. Several sporadic jobs have kept me busy and partially paid, but when I don't have a regular schedule, I hardly get anything done. I don't exercise and I don't write much. So to combat my lethargy, I've been selectively looking for work like a kid who only likes the brown M&Ms. Until recently, I haven't found exactly what I wanted. Now all of a sudden I have steady work with my Dad, which couldn't get more flexible or stress free. I also have a deal worked out in which I work for my rent. On top of all that, I just got a call from a local newspaper saying they might have editing work for me to do. Even if the paper thing falls through, I know that God is watching out for me. He clothes the lilies and all that.

Agent Workshop

2008-09-22T10:19:00.000-07:00

The KWA agent workshop not only taught me more about the publication process, but set me in front of a real agent. The lecture sessions kept my interest so well that the only reason I ever looked at my watch was so I wouldn't miss my consultation. I learned that my synopsis is too long, my hook too short, and my book too "narrative". Now I can fix those problems and finish my work, confident that I at least have an inkling of what I'm about.

The agent Joanna Stampfel looked over my summary, discussed my book with me, and read a few of my pages. Although we didn't sign a deal then and there (my book isn't even finished), she gave me some pointers and a huge confidence boost. I now get to send a whole thirty pages to her for her further analysis. Every connection helps; every bit of advice matters.

She also inspired me to read more quickly. How can I more effectively learn about my craft than through reading?